Tiffany is a junior at New York University. A seasoned socialite, she understands what’s cool and she understands that constantly acting busy will always be cool — regardless of age.

Although she interns part-time at NBC (her father hooked that shit up), she speaks authoritatively at the bars about the “changing face of journalism” — an expression she overheard. Nonetheless, the real story is that within a three-hour span this past Saturday morning, Tiffany sent out a relentless flurry of 32 separate Facebook updates, notifying friends that she is, indeed, busy. The AP reported earlier today that she updated her status — on average — every three minutes, beating her previous record of every 10 minutes last week.

The updates ranged from “SOOOO busy right now, no time for ANYTHING!!!” to more specific work-related grievances such as, “Don’t have time to think cuz office is so crazy today, I looked terrible today on camera — PUNCH ME!!”

More to come.

-js